Love Hina: Enemies
by English Bob
Summary: Strangers can appear anywhere and change everything, even in sleepy hinata. Chap 4 now, sorry for extremely late update.Review....please......anyone.............................tumbleweed rolls by..............
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Love Hina, fact

**Love Hina: Enemies**

AN: This fanfic takes place before volume 11 of the manga, but don't expect complete accuracy to the original, I ain't perfect. Hopefully you'll like this story, if you do please be kind enough to leave a review, if not leave one anyway saying what you didn't like so I can keep it for future reference. No flames please, unless PM.

I have a vague idea of where this fic is going, but no set plan, so I won't reveal anything yet. Anyhow read and review but most of all, enjoy.

For all spelling and grammar mistakes I apologize in advance

**Chapter 1: The Bin Man**

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It was a peaceful winters day in Hinata, and people went about their daily lives much like they did the day before and every other day before that. To an outsider in fact, it would seem to be a thoroughly quiet and sleepy little town, with no strange or unexpected happenings at all. To the old men sitting on a bench by the river, it too was a peaceful day, too peaceful in fact.

'Awfully quiet today' said one.

'Indeed it has been peaceful' said another.

'Shh!' said the third.

'What?' the others replied in unison.

'**AAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUU!'**

The scream had come from the house atop the hill overlooking the town. The old men, acting as though it were a reflex, quickly took cover underneath any available roof.

'**YOU PERVERT! WHAT WERE YOU DOING TO POOR SHINOBU!'**

'**ACK! NARU! I dind't do anything! This isn't what you think!'**

'**URASHIMA YOU LECHEROUS SCUM!'**

'**But I didn't!'**

'**SHUT UP AND EAT FIST!'**

'**EVIL CUTTING SWORD!'**

'**ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!'**

The old men watched with interest as a black dot was sent hurtling into space before turning and falling fast to earth. As it plummeted towards one of the old men, he deftly sidestepped and the object pummelled into the concrete. The men convened around the object, and were not surprised to find a rather battered young man steaming on the floor. This man was Keitaro Urashima, and he was not having a peaceful day at all. He was currently muttering incoherently, so the old men, having had their fun, wandered off to prophesise to some other unsuspecting pedestrians.

After a couple of minutes, Keitaro got up looking no worse for his free trip to the stratosphere. _But I dind't even touch the panties! They landed in front of my face for kamis sake! Naru was sooo pissed and Motoko…_(he shuddered involuntarily)…. _i won't even think about that, were the hell in town am I this time anyway._ After looking left and right, up and down, walking around for a bit and using a GPS he stopped and hung his head.

'Why is it every time they send me flying I always land in a part of town I know nothing about! I should really buy a map' he sighed to himself. 'I'm going to take ages to get back now, what'll the girls think?' He gasped in silent horror as the scene was played out in his head…………………

'_Where have you been then?'_

'_Naru, look I just got lost and…'_

'_Silence scum! I don't know what you've been doing but I bet it's perverted!'_

'_What! You'd swear I go on the hunt for innocent young girls or something. Geez!. Oh crap' he soon realized his mistake as Motoko appeared, demon eyes glowing in her sockets_

'_URASHIMA! YOU PERVERTED WATER DEMON! HOW DARE YOU DISGRACE THE WALLS OF THIS HOUSE WITH YOUR EXISTENCE! I SHALL ERADICATE YOUR FOUL KIND FROM THIS WORLD!' ..._

Keitaro's imagination went into overdrive, and he ran around swirly eyed flailing his arms around as the scene was replayed through his head repeatedly. This continued for several minutes, until he fell over the bench and head first into a bin. Keitaro's mind hadn't caught up with this latest turn of events however, and as he was pulled out of the bin by a kindly stranger he continued to gabble on.

'No Motoko I didn't do it. Why don't you believe me Naru? Motoko put the sword down please? Please? No! NOT AGAIN AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHH!' he screamed. The stranger who had helped him out of the bin sweat dropped at the strange spectacle of a man running from invisible people with a hunted expression on his face. Coming back to reality, he turned to thank the person.

'Er… thanks for pulling me out of the bin and all, its just that…that...' his voice trailed off as he took a look at the man stood before him.

He was about 7ft tall Keitaro estimated, with a heavy muscular build. He didn't look as though he came from Japan, but somewhere like America. He wore heavy duty boots and black combat trousers. An open green short sleeved shirt was all he wore over a thin black t-shirt. His face was obscured by the shadows he stood in, and he was wearing some sort of Cuban style cap on his head. There was something written on the t-shirt in English but Keitaro was to busy for language revision.

'**_You okay_**?' the man asked after seeing Keitaro's stare

'Eh? Came Keitaro's reply before he realised the man was speaking English, but he had a completely different accent to Sarah or Seta, who Keitaro had heard speak English occasionally.

'You okay?' the man repeated, this time in Japanese.

'Oh yes! Fine! Just Fine! HAHAHA!' Keitaro replied nervously, his tone bordering on psychotic. _I'm dead! If this guy hits me it's the end! Do not piss him off!._

'You sure you're okay?' the man asked again moving closer. As he did so, his shirt moved and Keitaro saw the glint of metal. _Ack! He's got a gun! Ack! Answer his question before you end up with a hole in your head!_ Keitaro's mind screamed.

'Yeah, Fine! Just a little er lost! Yes, Lost! Hhehehe!' he babbled. The man reached inside his shirt for something, Keitaro closed his eyes and prayed_ I'm DEAD!_ before he felt the man press something into his hand. He opened his eyes and looked at the map he held. 'Thh…Thanks…' was all he could whimper.

'Don't mention it' the man dismissed as he turned and began to walk off down an alley.

Keitaro shouted after him 'Wait, What's your name!' The man stopped but did not turn around, a thin smile spread on his face. 'To you I am known as Akiro Sakesayu' the man said before disappearing down the alleyway. _He wasn't even cold!_ Thought Keitaro as he made his way back to Hinata house. It began to snow. Up on a roof top somewhere in the town, a man smiled to himself, 'Hehe, what an idiot that guy was, sure would hate to live with him'

_END OF CHAPTER_

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Well, what'd you think? Leave a review with your comments and I will be posting the next chapter in 2 weeks after a brief holiday (Haha!). This is so much easier than writing 40k fanfiction phew…….

_NEXT CHAPTER : **Chapter 2: One for the money**_


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Sorry this is late, longer holiday than anticipated, also the chapter name changed due some new ideas I had while on holiday. Thank you to Thursday Addams for reviewing.

**Love Hina: Enemies**

**Chapter 2: Left Luggage**

_**Hello-**_Keitaro's thoughts

_Hello-_Keitaro's sub-concious

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Keitaro was still lost. He had in fact spent twenty minutes looking for the Bismarkplatz, until he realized the man had in fact given him a map of Munich. What made it worse was the total lack of any other human being, the place was deserted, but a couple of times Keitaro swore he could hear laughing behind him.

'I wonder if that guy followed me……..'he thought about it for a few seconds , then dismissed it with a nervous 'Nah, why would anyone follow me just to laugh at…'. It suddenly dawned on Keitaro that there were a whole number of reasons for someone to follow him to a deserted area, all of them seemed worse than merely being laughed at.

He quickly hid behind a convenient large object to gather his thoughts, a difficult task for him indeed. As his madly pin-wheeling brain attempted to deal with the situation, a thought arose from the dim depths of his conscience where it had been lurking for some time.

_What the HELL is that briefcase doing there?_

When the rest of his mind finally caught up with this question it too asked: **_Yeah, what IS that briefcase doing there?_**

Keitaro very slowly and carefully walked towards the briefcase, like a man walking on very thin ice. It was just sitting there in the middle of the pavement. Looking around to check there was nobody watching him, he slowly bent down to inspect it. It was just a normal briefcase, but living with Su had taught Keitaro to be cautious when opening everyday items (a chief example of this would be when Keitaro had opened the fridge one morning to find that he had just armed a nuclear bomb, and that it was set to go off in 30 seconds, after being forced to disable the bomb, a grumpy Su had said that she was only 'protecting her dessert') Very delicately, he opened the case.

Inside was just a thin sheaf of papers and a couple of CDs. He took out the papers and scanned the first page. It was in a language Keitaro didn't understand, but he did recognize the stamping that covered nearly the entire sheet.

'TOP SECRET' and 'CONFIDENTIAL' seemed to be the main theme.

He looked at the other sheets, they where all the same. Keitaro gingerly replaced them back in the case and pulled out a CD marked 'PERSONNEL DATA-DELETED FILE BACK UP' and another marked 'CONTACT AND CLIENT LIST-CURRENT'. He put these back and sighed. 'Great, just some company's staff list, no use to me at all.' Only then did he notice the map lying next to the case. It was the correct map for the area. He could hardly believe his luck as he hurriedly picked it up but paused as a familiar dim depth of his conscience stirred again. _Convenient huh? _Keitaro was still on luck induced high and didn't want to be bothered by some measly sub-conscious now.

_**Oh shut up, just because you're a dim depth in my mind doesn't mean you can ruin everything for me, got it?**_

_I'm just saying that…_

_**SHUT UP! Not another word from you, clear?**_

_Fine_

_**Good**_

_Just don't say I didn't…_

_**SHUT UP!**_

Happy that he had just won an argument, even if it was with himself, Keitaro picked up the map and turned to walk away but stopped himself, turned again and, out of sheer curiosity and stupidity picked up the briefcase.

_I don't think that's a good…_

**_Oi! What'd I just tell you, BE QUIET!_**

_But…_

_**NO BUTS!**_

With this internal fracas resolved Keitaro triumphantly began his journey back to Hinata, and whatever pervert hating fate awaited him.

What he didn't see was men stepping out of the shadows, a different man this time, pull out what was remarkably like a sniper rifle and aim at what was remarkably like Keitaro's head. He didn't even hear what sounded remarkably like a silenced gunshot.

The body slumped to the ground, his brains now creating an interesting fresco on the wall behind him. Out of yet more shadows came a sigh, before the one shadow moved off again into the town.

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Up on a rooftop overlooking the scene, a man fiddled with some kind of communication equipment (the really hi tech kind that don't use Christmas lights for the flashy bits.)

'Russo here' said the man into the com set.

'Go ahead Russo' replied a businesslike voice from the other end.

'The package has been delivered, no need to intervene, the target is just as dumb as you suspected.'

'Not dumb Russo, just…slow I think. No hostile interference?'

'One man sir, tried to take the kids head off with a sniper.'

'You have dealt with him I trust.'

'Not me sir, someone else got him first, silenced round right in the head from about 100 metres I'm guessing.'

'Pity, it would have been useful to question him. Did you see the man who shot him?'

'No sir, he was obscured by the shadows and then disappeared. Perhaps the target has protection other than our own?'

'Not of his own choosing anyhow, we have been monitoring his communications, he is completely oblivious to the events at hand. Do you know the deceased's identity?

'Yes sir, he is, was, Netsuke Gendo, small time man, never warranted our attention until now.'

'Hmm, search his background, then erase his existence, I do not want unnecessary bodies appearing at this stage.'

'Right sir, one more thing, I found a trace of the other man sir, it's not much, but it may be something to go on.'

'What?'

'A cigar sir.'

'What brand?'

'Sorry sir?'

'What brand of cigar Russo?' snapped the comm. link.

'Er… Old Particular slim patella's sir, the really nasty cheap kind I think.'

'………….' The comm. was silent.

'Sir?'

'Russo, clear up that mess and cease shadowing the target immediately.'

'Cease shadowing the target sir? Why?'

'For your own safety and contact Captain Balveda of your whereabouts, she'll be in touch.'

'But…Balveda! Sir, do you mean?'

'I must take precautions Russo; you know I must, good work agent.' Click With that the comm. link ended. Leaving a confused and somewhat excited Russo on the rooftop.

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A/N: Hope you liked that chapter, theres a hint of plot now, so it should start to run a bit smoother as the story unfolds.

Next update, 3-4 days time.


	3. Chapter 3

**Love Hina: Enemies**

A/N: Sorry this was so late; I'm having real trouble with my workload for the moment. Here is the next chapter, more character development. I apologize that there hasn't been much of the other 'Love Hina' characters apart from Keitaro, but they'll be appearing in force in the next chapter after this one. And now without further ado, the chapter;

**Chapter 3: Money for nothin'**

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It was early evening by the time Keitaro dragged his body up to the Hinata House.

'23 kilometres, new record' he mumbled as he entered the building. He found the girls in the lounge. Su was busy with some kind of mecha-tama type object (Keitaro shuddered, as its use would probably end up causing him a large amount of pain). Kitsune was laid face down on the sofa, sake bottles strewn around her. Next to her was Haruka, face as impassive as ever, cigarette in mouth. Motoko was meditating in a corner, but kept periodically shouting at Su for interrupting her. Naru was sat on the floor reading a textbook. No-one noticed him as he came in, so he went to his room to get changed, he had been in a bin after all.

On his way out he noticed the briefcase. He stared at it in bemusement for a moment, and before a certain sub-conscious voice decided to start bugging him again, he shoved it away in the wardrobe. 'I'll sort that out later' he told himself, before heading back into the lounge.

This time he was noticed by Haruka. 'Hey Keitaro, I was starting to think you'd committed suicide or something out there'

'No Aunt OW!' he yelped as an all too familiar fan made its appearance. 'No Haruka, I just got a little lost, that's all' he managed to say to his aunt, who for some reason hadn't needed to move from where she was sat to hit him. Keitaro sighed and made to sit down also, but was met by the face of Naru instead. A very _angry _looking Naru at that.

_Nothing unusual there then. _Keitaro made a mental note to find the part of his brain that was his sub-conscious, and then promptly beat it to death with a large object.

'Where have you been then?' Naru's words shook him out of his thought.

'Naru, look I just got lost and then this guy gave me a map of Munich and…'

'Silence scum! I don't know what you've been doing but I bet it's perverted!'

'What! You'd swear I go on the hunt for innocent young girls or something. Geez!. Oh crap' he soon realized his mistake as Motoko appeared, demon eyes glowing in their sockets.

'URASHIMA! YOU PERVERTED WATER DEMON! HOW DARE YOU DISGRACE THE WALLS OF THIS HOUSE WITH YOUR EXISTENCE! I SHALL ERADICATE YOUR FOUL KIND FROM THIS WORLD!'

'**_ARGGHH ITS HAPPENING AGAIN, FOR REAL THIS TIME! CRAP CRAP CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHH!' _**was the last thing he thought as he was sent soaring upwards, through the roof, and out into the sky, for the second time that day.

And so another day passed at the Hinata house, pretty much as usual.

-------**At the same time as Keitaro gets in….** ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Akiro Sakesayu was in a bar. This was his first default state of being nowadays. His second was generally to be unconscious.

He was not in fact that tall, as Keitaro had perceived him to be, but was in fact around the same height as Seta. He wasn't as big physically as Keitaro had thought either, his muscles were there, and he was a medium heavy build, but they didn't stand out like a bodybuilder's. He'd deceived Keitaro using an old trick of the light that he used with practised ease, when he was sober anyway.

Currently he was staring at the glass in front of him; for one thing, it was actually a jar. Why it was a jar he couldn't quite remember, but he knew for a definite fact that it contained whiskey. He took stock of his surroundings, seeing them as if for the first time. He tried to remember how he'd got here, and vaguely recalled coming in for a celebratory drink to celebrate the fact he hadn't had a drink all day. It wasn't that he drank to get drunk, as his size and amazing alcohol tolerance often prevented him from getting too plastered; it was just that he liked to keep his brain sizzling just below the sobriety line. He didn't not like being sober, its just that it made him think too much, and act too much for that matter.

There were two old men sat next to him, wearing flat caps on their heads and hard done by looks on their faces. (This is because any bar, anywhere in the universe, will always invariably have two old men wearing flat caps, or the cosmic equivalent thereof, hanging around somewhere, they might not always be seen, but they're definitely there, you've just got to look.) They were talking, and Akiro was half-listening, for no other reason than the fact there as nothing better for him to do. The old men continued to rant on about various modern things, and how they weren't as good as the old things.

'Take jobs' said one 'I've been going to that warehouse since I was yaay big' and Akiro made a note to himself to find out one day how big that actually was.

'And I get paid a pittance for me work I do, and its hard work I tells you, fridges don't move themselves you know.' He continued to drone.

'But its good **honest **work mind you, not like that lad up there' the man said, jerking his thumb in the direction of the large widows that took up a wall of the room. Through them Akiro could see some kind of traditional style inn perched on the top of a hill.

'Shameful, that's what it is' said the other man. Akiro began to listen more intently.

'Right! Shameful **and **disgraceful'

'Er, what is?' asked Akiro who had surfaced from his pit of alcohol long enough to become interested. The two men looked at him, then at the wide array of empty glasses in front of the man. They both nodded in agreement, anyone who could drink like there was no tomorrow was worthy of their enlightenment, as they had been doing it since time immemorial.

'Well, you see stranger, that old house on that hill over there, well it used to be a inn right'

Akiro nodded, this made sense to him at least, unlike the fact that the jar he was holding was now empty, which he couldn't quite understand at all.

'Weeeell anyway, that place is now a like a…..' the man struggled to find the right words from his limited experience with this sort of thing 'girls dormitory, yeah that's it' he managed ' but he point is that a little while ago its management was taken over by this young man...' The mans expression made it clear he did not approve of that sort of thing.

'But anyway, this guy gets to spend all day up there, every day, with all those gorgeous beautiful women, and gets paid for it!' the other firmly stated.

'It sinful, that's what it is'

'Yeah, all those women for one man…..' it was clear that the second man also didn't approve of that sort of thing, at least when it didn't involve him.

Akiro was mildly intrigued 'What's his name?'

'Who?' said the first man, trying to busy himself with drinking.

'The person who you were just talking about!' but the man merely continued to look puzzled.

'You know, disgraceful, perverted? Ringing any bells?' he tried while waving his arms wildly in front of the drunkards face.

'Oh, you should've said, hey Bob!' the man called over to a small balding man who happened to be the bartender.

'Yes?'

'What's the name of that guy on the hill?'

'Oh him? Er… Urashima I think.'

'You sure?' the man asked.

'That's what I hear anyways, always 'URASHIMA!' this and 'URASHIMA!' that, I think his first name is..'

'Keitaro Urashima?' Akiro volunteered

'Keitaro! Yeah that's right, Keitaro Urashima.' Said the bartender as he began to polish a glass (this is the default state of being for most bartenders, despite there hardly ever being any clean glasses)

'That old house of his can't be in good shape though' began the second old man ' with him bein' so 'occupied' n all' he said before sinking into a jealous silence, mumbling about something along the lines of _'s'not fair' _and _'should be illegal, not sharin like that'_

Certain gears in Akiros brain began to turn very slowly, gears that hadn't turned in a good few years shook off their coating of dust and started the slow march towards sobriety. They did, however, need a little liquid encouragement. He motioned over a very happy looking bartender.

'Another whiskey sir? I can probably find a glass this time, maybe even a clean one' the bartender said with the utmost glee; between the stranger and the old men he'd made an absolute fortune. Sure, the guy looked strange, and talked strange, and paid with strange money, but the barman didn't care, a few more nights and he could go into early retirement.

'No thank you, just the bill and some coffee please' Akiro said in a faraway tone of voice, parts his brain were still waking up from their alcoholic stupor.

'How strong would sir like his coffee' said the barman, a little disappointed.

Akiros answer was to stand up, grab the man by the lapels of apron hold him up to his mad bloodshot eyes and say, in a voice that sounded like granite slabs hitting a metal floor, 'As strong as is humanly possible, blacker than the void and so stewed it can corrode metal!' the barmen nodded as he was put down and, as though the previous incident happened al the time, went straight back into his default state (glass in hand).

'Sure thing sir. Small, medium or large?'

'In a bucket, if you would be so kind'

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As the old men watched Akiro leave, bucket in hand, they both turned to lookout of the big windows at the Hinata house. The light gleamed of the roof of the building, and the old men continued to stare for a while, until the first said.

'I install microwave ovens for a living, what I'd give to never have to work a day in my life'

'Yeah, I deliver custom kitchens, it ain't right, us lot labouring away down here while that lot piss around up there'

'Yeah, get your money for nothin' ' said the first before sipping his beer.

'And your chicks for free' said the other watching the small black dot that was Keitaro soar into the outer atmosphere.

_**End of chapter**_

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A/N: so there you have it, the plot begins to unfold more clearly in the next chapter. Hoped you enjoyed it and thank you for reading.

Next update: 1 week (at max, I promise!)


	4. Chapter 4

Hello again.

Sorry for the incredibly long update time but I must've rewritten this chapter over 20 times and I'm still not fully happy with it, that and other reasons such as plot changes etc.

So here iss the fourth instalment of **Enemies, **enjoy.

**Love Hina: Enemies**

**Chapter 4: Clandestine Greetings**

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The snow was beginning to come down hard as Keitaro dragged himself up the Hinata steps for the second time that day. He rubbed his ribs where he'd landed on the ground, not so far this time, a mere 500ft down the steps.

''Great, twice in one day, I haven't managed to study at all, I'll never get into Tokyo U at this rate, look at me now, and I've even started talking to myself!!! Damn it!!'' he shouted and, in usual Keitaro fashion, began working himself into a whirling frenzy of hysteria.

Keitaro began to run round with his arms flailing wildly, until a kind lamppost decided it had a civic duty to perform and very helpfully stopped him. Eventually coming back to his senses, he slowly stood up again, leaning against the lamppost for support. From the open doors of the house his nose was greeted by the smell of Shinobu's cooking wafting from the kitchen. Hs stress evaporated as he lost himself in the gorgeous aromas. He started walking back to the door.

'**_At least I can rely on Shinobu-chan's cooking to calm me down.' _**He thought as he neared the porch, the beautiful aromas of Shinobus cooking filling his nostrils. Then he picked up another, and much more unwelcome, stench of cigar smoke.Keitaro began to cough violently as the acrid smoke filled his lungs.He moved out of the cloud of smoke and took in a great lungful of fresh air. Only after a couple of seconds did he finally realize he was being laughed at.

'HAHAHAHA!!''

It was a dry, coarse laugh. Keitaro turned to see a man leaning on the wall just inside the doorway. He seemed to be the same man Keitaro had seen earlier.

Only, he looked slightly different. He seemed shorter for one thing, but still quite tall. He wasn't as imposing either, and no longer wore the hat so Keitaro could see his face. He had a youngish but well worn face, and Keitaro could see that the man clearly hadn't shaved for several days. His hair was a thick nest of darkish brown, and looked in need of a trim.

The man was leaning against the lamppost looking at Keitaro in a quizzical fashion, with a kind of lopsided smirk on his face, cigar in the corner of his mouth. _**Kinda like Haruka**…_ Keitaro thought as he stood there. After about a couple of seconds Keitaro realized the man was waiting for him to say something.

'Who are you is generally a good starting point.' The man prompted.

'Er……Oh……Er…Oh me?' Keitaro stuttered.

'Seeing as you're the one I'm talking too, yes'

'Er..Okay..erm..Who are you?'

'Ah! Of course forgive me for not introducing myself, I am Akiro Sakesayu' the man gave a long theatrical bow 'We met before I believe'

The hippo of recollection finally dragged itself out of the mire of stupidity in Keitaros mind 'Yeah we did, you..you gave me a map of bloody Munich, I spent hours wandering round in circles because of you!!!!!!' Keitaro stated, beginning to get indignant.

The man took his cigar out of his mouth and motioned Keitaro to calm down.

'Hehe, easy mistake to make, easy mistake to make'

'Mistake!!! Oh that's a real great excuse! Because of that 'Mistake' of yours I ended up getting a free trip to the stratosphere!!!'

'Oh, so that explains the screaming…'

'Damn right! Do you have any idea how much landing on concrete from 200 feet hurts?'

Akiro didn't reply, he just took a long drag on the cigar he was holding. Looking up and seeing Keitaros anger, he pulled out a battered metal cigar case and held it out to him.

'Sorry, did you want one? You only have to ask ya know'

This comment derailed Keitaro from his train of thought, and he couls only say 'Er, no I er don't smoke….'

'Fair 'nough' Akiro said tucking the case back in his shirt pocket. Keitaro managed to marshall his sscattered thoughts once again.

'So what do you want? What are you doing here in the first place?!'

'Hmm… Well Mr Urashima'

'What! How'd you know my name?'

'Oh that, well everyone in the town was saying things like 'That Urashima did this' and 'That Urashimas a real pervert from what I heard'' Keitaro fell over at this point'' and also 'that Urashima boy is never going to get into Tokyo U' plus 'He's a real idiot that Urashima' coupled with the fact that I heard the cry of 'URASHIMA!!!' from the hill here, it didn't really take me long to find out who you were, erm, you okay?

Keitaro was lying on the floor his glasses glazed over mumbling 'Why me.. why me….' Before shaking his head and getting back up. He was about to reply, when he was cut off.

'Hey Kei-Kun!!' said a sing song voice.

Te two men turned to see a young woman with dark brown hair running towards them from the steps.

'Hey Kei- Kun!! Who's that your with?' the woman repeated. Akiro could only mutter one word while staring at the woman.

'…melons…' the woman was carrying four large watermelons in a bag slung over her shoulder.

'Mutsumi-Chan be careful, you'll slip on the ice!!!' Keitaro shouted.

'What was that' said Mutsumi still running towards them.

What happened next would remain in Akiros memory for all time as one of the strangest things he had ever witnessed. The melon lady got only a few more steps towards them before she tripped up, on what to Akiro looked like thin air, before skidding forwards and tripping up further on the watermelons. Keitaro then ran forward to stop her fall but as he did so he too skidded on a patch of air which put him on a direct collision course with one of the rouge melons. This then tripped him up sending him flying towards the woman. There was a loud and distinct **CLUNK **sound as their heads collided and they both collapsed on top of one another in a mangled heap, their eyes spiralling wildly.

Akiro sweat dropped while gawking at the two figures in front of him. Finally shaking his head he went over to the two. Figuring that getting them inside out of the snow would be the best course of action he easily picked up one idiot in each arm and walked into the Hinata-Sou.

'What the hell have I got myself into this time'

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Meanwhile in Nevada, an old woman drank her tea. She was reading a newspaper and gave a little chuckle as she read one of the articles.

A knock at the door made her look up from where she was sitting by a fireplace.

'Come in' she said in a voice that belied her true age.

The door opened to reveal a young woman with black hair tied back in two ponytails dressed in a dark gothic dress. Behind her there was a man wearing a black overcoat and black sunglasses. The old woman smiled.

'Ah Kanako-chan, what is it you have there?' the old woman asked in a very old-woman like voice.

'Granny, this is Mr Schalt, he said he needed to see you on a matter of great importance' said the young woman gesturing to the man behind her.

'Ah yes of course, do let him in, and Kanako, while your there can you nip down to the kitchen and fetch an old woman a hot drink?' this time the voice was so granny like it practically knitted its own sweater for your Christmas present.

The woman nodded and ushered the man inside before closing the door behind her. The man stood awkwardly in the middle of the floor.

'Well, what does Raphael want this time' the one known as 'Granny' said to the man, all trace of graniness gone from her voice, instead being replaced by a harsh firmness.

The man was shocked 'How…How did you….Who told you I was.' He withered under the old woman's stare.

'Anyone who wears sunglasses after 7pm either needs their head examined or is performing an act of a clandestine nature, Raphael always sends the new guy to give me information so its easy for me to deduce'

'Er…erm' the man fumbled with his glasses, finally taking them off altogether.

'Well what is it you want, my time is precious you know'

'Er..ahem..the boss said to give you this letter' the man took a envelope from the pocket of his coat and handed it to her. He stood there expectantly for a few more seconds before the old woman looked up.

'Still here?'

'Er –gulp- the boss said you sometimes pay for information……..' his voice trailed off under another withering stare from Granny.

'He did, did he? Oh well you'll find him mistaken on that one, please don't hesitate to leave' she motioned to the door. The man scurried back out, and Kanako walked back in with a tray of tea.

Granny read through the letter and gave a small chuckle before throwing it in the fire.

Kanako looked up at the old woman. 'What is it granny'

'Hehe…he…oh nothing child, nothing for your concern, buts lets just say that your Onii-chan will be having some fun very soon if that letter was correct, a lot of fun indeed.'

Kanako simply nodded before adding 'I noticed your other cup of tea by the way'

The older woman merely sighed and said 'Indeed, well, there is always time for tea, have a seat child, just watch wear you walk, I think that young man left his glasses here somewhere'

_**To be continued**_

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Well there it is, hope you liked it, if you did, or even if you didn't please leave a review……please?

Next update: lies lies lies (that about covers it)


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